Graduating from IIT Delhi

I wanted to write some stuff. I logged in bloggers.com to create my blog and soon realised I already had a blog. What?? But I never signed up. 'The fighter life at IITD'. That was my first blog. I thought it was long gone. It had died out. A look at the blog showed that a google search by the keywords 'life at iitd ' and my blog was the top hit on the page. All credit goes to the title. I have known since long that I am a shitty writer. But writing isn't some writer's prerogative. I'll write anything I want like I did before. Btw I am getting more than ten new views each day without sharing it or doing anything with it. People are just curious about IITs . They can't help it. I can't help it either. Cheers to that! I already have a different blog called 'Habeeb's Guide to Screwing Up' which is yet to see it's first post. You can access it from here Guidetoscrewingup.blogspot.com. 
          So this is the last post on this blog and I want to write about how it feels to get out of IIT . A lot worse. Your safety blanket is gone. You lose a great campus and the friends you made for life are now distributed around the world pursuing their career. Everyone has his own stuff to look after. On weekdays people have jobs, on weekends they sometimes find the time to meet up or go out of town or just stay at home and think about the golden times and feel miserable or happy depending upon the person. I usually try to sleep more and meet a couple of friends nearby. This is real life. Well, real life sucks but some people like it. But then some people, no a lot of people also like Justin Bieber so people really don't have much credibility. I went to hyderabad for 8 months and then changed job quickly to shift to Delhi. I can tell you there is no place in the world not even my own home that makes me as happy as IIT Delhi. It's fucking full of hope, full of smart kids who will get great jobs tomorrow, and there's all kinds of things going on all the time. Compared to that real life is pretty boring and mundane.  I feel safe in my home. In IIT I feel ready to take on the world. Plus there is a hardened chemistry with your college group that will last a lifetime. We try to arrange google hangouts every two months. Super fun moments for sure! I miss a lot of things. The Wind-T, our own Chi-Point, R2, Aravali Hostel wings.  I don't miss the mess food though. I still don't know what half of the things they served us were. Sometimes it just looked like you were a part of some weird food experiment where they would try random stuff on you to see how you responded. Can't explain food that bad otherwise. I miss the fact you could do pretty much anything thing you wanted there. You don't want to the class. Fuck it! who cares ? You haven't prepared for the exam. Getting a medical certificate is pretty easy. You can always photoshop it. There you go. No exam tomorrow. Project? Use copy paste. Why waste useful hours on that?  There are real life skills to learn like not doing anything at all, just having a good time , going out and talking 'about' girls. On the topic of girls, I still remember getting in IIT and thinking "ab toh ladki mil hi jaegi" . I am still hopeful and most people in my hostel group are too. We did hook up with girls time to time but when it comes to ending the day we still have nothing other than our own hands to look at. Regarding money. Fuck money. After getting 12 lakh an year you will still feel like a poor fuck. It's just that we humans are messed up and all the good things except beautiful smart wives don't take money into account. (PS if you want that you either get rich or really good at a mysterious art which I clearly suck at). 

          To recount my last day in IIT. I woke up late. One by one everyone was leaving. Each day some of my friends would leave for good. Emotion was in the air. Some people left silently. Some started crying. Some cried a few days or even months in advance. Some just cried whenever they thought about leaving. It was touching except sometimes a guy would cry in the most ridiculous way and you would be trying real hard not  to laugh in his face. I was going to take an auto to the metro station. Four of my friends came to drop me. The others had already left. I knew I was going to meet them again in a month or maybe even an year but it was never going to be the same. Life as I knew it was coming to an end. Having said farewell to so many friends who had left before me I thought I would leave without much emotional drama. And I did. We went up to the coffee shop near the hostel gate. I had a mostly empty pack of cigarettes with me. Me and my friend took out one each from it and smoked our last cigarette as a tribute. Then I hugged them goodbye. No crying. No drama. The auto moved a hundred meters and I didn't know what the fuck to do. It was suddenly all real. It was suddenly over. My eyes starting filling up with tears and I sobbed like a baby in that auto for five minutes. Then I regained composure and headed home. It was the end of an era.    

THE BEGINNING AND THE END

For god's sake dont get excited about the cheesy title.First semester at iitd is over for good.highlights: i got a 8.8 cgpa , learned a lot about music etc etc. for the good of this blog i ll skip this part as only dumb wiill like to hear about some guy boasting.Now let me get to the point .Yes the start and the end.When we entered iitd we were a bunch of muggers trapped in a gloomy hostel.Most of the guys woke up at 6:30 for a class at 8(except me n a few more).i woke up at 7,some even earlier.By the end most woke up at 7:30 for a class at 8.(to tell u my case i mostly missed the class at 8 and if i had to go i would wake up at 7:50.ha ha .now tell me whos the biggest bastard of all ).By the end of it most of us had transformed,some had realised the truth(ill tell what the truth is ),some had gotten more trapped in the circle but above all i realised that the crowd at iitd was far better than most uptu or ip colleges .People are good here,great actually.No they are not the smart talented hunks u imagine when u think of iit and they are bad at intriguing girls .Many haven't done anything in their lives except studying ,collecting knowledge and all the things any normal guy loathes doing.but iit is supposed to be their transformation stage where they turn from mugggers into responsible adults.Another thing i ve actually noticed about iitians is that many of them(including me ) liked this girl at some point in their lives and they all couldn't get her to like them because of their studious image,lack of good looks or simply because they never bothered about grooming or having fun in their lives.But the good part is after getting into iit most of them actually can impress girls just by telling them they study in iitd (ha ha how's that for a change).Maybe because the girls believe that these guys have a great future and the truth is that even if i study at an average of 5 min per day i will actually at least get a starting salary of 15 lakh.(all the people who dont study in iit read this and despair).but i must tell every girl reading this that most iitians are actually very good at heart and ur gonna be actually happier with an iitian than with any other guy(i dont want to comment about me).So enough with my philosophy,first semester at iitd is over and there is only one more part of iit left to be understood,the POLTU of iitd.

ACADEMICS AT IITD

now reading my previous posts you migt think that life at iit is close to heavenly experience but this blog is certainly gonna give you a good total picture of the life at iitd.now most people seriously study for iitd when they are told that these are the only two oyears of your struggle and that life in college is going to be great.let me tell you about the academics at iitd .i hve 29 hours of class a week making the schedule very busy .i have seven courses in all and unfortunately for my good rank and my electrical department we have quite a few tough courses.theres no class topper here.competition is not like its in school .in school you had a few students working it out for the first position but here everyone is a bastard .they all study like hell and if you for some reason stop studying like hell then you are left behind.its only one month since we have joined the college and the first minors are hovering over heads instilling terror in it.but probably you might have thought students must be really serious about studies here but here again i must tell u non iitians can only guess how we iitians are like and i can ssure you half of there guesses are going to be strikingly contradictary.most students hardly leave a chance to sleep in the lectures.if a lecture turns boring(which more often it does )a lecture theatre transforms into a sleeping theatre.Dont ask me why but i truly consider phl or physics 110 class to be the most trustworthy way of treating insomenia.the competion is tough at iitd .

THE MOST IMPORTANT ELEMENT OF IIT HOSTEL LIFE - BAKCHODI AT IIT

Now let me first explain you what bakchodi is. Bakchodi is a word due to the iitians. For a hostelier like me there is no more sacred word than bakchodi .Without it hostel life is just as boring as the non-hostel life. For a fresher bakchodi is the favourite past time and right now when i am writing this blog 5 more people in my room are currently doing bakchodi. Ok , I wandered too far. Now let me explain you what bakchodi is. bakchodi is like talking. But it's not normal talking. When two people are discussing their class schedule then its not bakchodi. But when a lot of people sit together idly and talk about girls, sports or any of the common topics guys talk about then it's bakchodi. Bakchodi is the most enjoyable waste of your time and when we reached our hostel seniors continuously warned us against bakchodi. There are some people which are certified bakchods. There are some rooms that are bakchodi rooms . About half of my days go in bakchodi and the rest goes in studies, completing NSO hours and drums. My roomy rahul is by far the biggest bakchod i have ever seen. He does bakchodi for around 5 hours then enters our room at around 1 am and says"chal yaar ab pad leta hoon". Somebody plz tell that bastard that 1 am is my sleeping time. Sleep at iit is rare. Before iit i would sleep for 8 hours even on the most busy days, even in boards, even in jee but here sleeping for 6 hrs(plus the hours we spend sleeping in lectures) feels like a good night sleep.

RAGGING AT IITD

          Ragging rules are really strict at iitd.In the first week of our stay we were not allowed to be outside of our rooms after 9:30.Intros were being taken and the best part was that all of your intro had to be in Hindi .I mean who knows what jee is called in Hindi (for you people its called sanyukt pravesh pareeksha) and who knows what cricket is called in hindi(gol pind lamba dand dhad pakad pratiyogita).We were asked the basic vocabulary of iitd, like what does hukka maarna,whats maski maarna,meaning of frequency etc etc.people who had never abused in their lives were asked "koi fight to ni hain na gaaliyon se ." or "gaaliyan kyu ni deta.chal koi ni seekh jaega .mai bhi ni deta tha" .Fucchas were asked about their lives ,where they live ,whether they are full toss (full toss means who has cleared jee along with his 12th exam) or a tappa, they had a girlfriend or not .We were made to call our seniors 'sir' and everytime we met the seniors we were expected to wish them good morning or good evening. Laughing was strictly not allowed while you're with the seniors but you could see an obvious fear in the seniors for the ragging laws which in iitd are really strict. If u complain against a senior then within a week he's out of the hostel. It doesn't matter if you have logged a true complaint or a fake one the senior was in trouble. There was a team of some faculty members who visited the fresher wing at night and any senior caught was to be expelled out of the hostel. For some reasons I don't know I had become quite a well known fuchcha among the seniors. All the course teachers had told us the reference books for their courses. Because i play drums i had become acquainted with a few seniors who come to the music room. To borrow a book I was told to go to room no C4. It was still the first week of the college and for a fuchcha to go to the senior wing alone was a big thing. So I took amritesh along . When we reached the senior wing ,one senior who knew my name asked us "kyu be fuchcho ,bahut himmat hai ,kya karne aae ho."."sir ,wo book leni hai C43 se " I answered in a cool tone .he told me go to the mess at the ground floor with some empty bottles. When i returned he had the book in his hand ."tum dono chill ho na " now what did that meant. Obviously we were chill but at that moment i wanted to say no but we can't tell the senior we're not chill. We needed the book. We were ready to become chill for that. I said "haan". After that he led us to a room where two other seniors were there .he sat down on the bed and told us to close the door. Then another one asked "agar abhi warden aa gaya toh kya bologe .achha sa bahana batao." For a few seconds we stood their silence. Then another said "jindagi me kabhi bahana banaya hai ya nai ". Amritesh replied no. I was stunned .now ok u expect very seedha saadha students to come to iit but amritesh god !this place was full of surprises."haan bahut baar.bol denge ki book lene aae the ."I said."bhausdike ,darwaja band karke kaunsi book lete hain". He was right. He had made a point then I told them a few more excuses and one of them they liked. So now the ragging began. I was handed a bedsheet and told to wrap it like a saaree , then i was made to dance like a girl by shaking my ass. Then it was amritesh's turn to dance and I was told that to slap his ass as he shook it. After a few minutes we were given a empty Deo bottle and we were told to smooch it. I went first .the seniors cheered as i smooched .i was a good smoocher i learned that moment."saale tu toh kya smooch le raha hai "said one .then it was amritesh's turn. To be dishonest he wasn't a good smoocher .and to be honest he smooched like he was kissing a cow .I was told to smooch again to show him how its done. After the smooching ,they told me to say five lines on mango ."aam peela hota hai.aam garmiyon me aata hain.aam barishon ke baad chala jata hai......aam ko log choos choos ke khate hain ."I  went. Then one of them told me to repeat all those lines and in every line substitute aam for mera land. I repeated and all of them roared. Each time me and amritesh started laughing we were told not to laugh. Then it was amritesh's turn."tujhe game samajh aa gai na be ,to tu ab bol tarbooz pe ". Then came the best part of the whole ragging experience. The seniors told me that I could laugh.as amritesh said the line"tarbooz laal hota hai.yeh gol hota hai .isme kaale beej hote hai .yeh bel pe ugta hain .mujhe tarbooz khana bahut pasand hain."then one senior told him to substitute watermelon for mere tatte(in case u dont know tatte means scrotum or balls in english ). He repeated the lines. Now let me tell you with each line he said I laughed like hell and by the time he had reached the line"mujhe mere tatte khaana pasand hai" i was rolling on the floor laughing. My cheeks were hurting. My stomach pained and I just couldn't laugh any longer but the way he was saying it was damn funny. After that the seniors gave us the book and left us this wonderful story to tell. So this was how I was ragged the first time in my life. Ragging is about to start in iitd after the freshers night and I am looking forward to it .

THE IIT CULTURE

          Just in the first week at iitd we were very well introduced to the culture of iitd . IIT has its own vocabulary. Stud is a guy who is very good at something, fighter is someone who studies too much or puts some good effort in something, fuchcha is a first year student, tappa is someone who has dropped a year and so on. There are at least 50 words like that which have a different meaning.now for anyone who reads about delhi university will get a totally different view of life here. Here we don't speak in english ,we have our own language with the most frequently words as bhenchod, chutiya, maadarchod unlike the DU. We speak in hindi all the time except for the south indians thats because they can't speak hindi. But we don't see them as more civilised humans who can speak more fluent english than us , rather they pitied for not being able to understand when someone says"bhenchod,aaj to gand mar gai ". Rather here to judge someone we ask his branch and his AIR(known as hawa here). There's hardly any pressure for becoming a style statement here cause there are hardly any girls and beautiful girls are an endangered species here. Pornography goes like normal movies and masturbation is a common activity. Here people don't shy away when you ask them "do u masturbate?"and someone will say "ya, three times a week."and the big thing is that it is perfectly normal .377 is a common number here because of the delhi high court order. On the second day of my stay one senior told me very seriously"dekh yaar humare seniors bhi haraami the hum bhi haraami hain aur hum tumse bhi yahi expect karte hai ki tum bhi haraami banoge aur iit ka culture aage badaoge". Hostel spirit is high in iit . Every hostel people are supposed to be different like my hostel aravali is known for sports, kumaon is known for dance and jwalamukhi students are known as IC(institute chutiya) because they got the iitians banned in AIIMS (yes in case u didn't know. In their fest the AIIMS people put up the slogan "DOGS AND IITIANS ARE NOT ALLOWED" and in our we put "DOGS ARE ALLOWED BUT AIIMIANS ARE NOT ALLOWED") also if u don't speak gaalis then you'll probably start speaking them . We were told on the second day"ab se tumhaari senior ladkiyaan tumhaari maae hain aur tumhaare saath waali tumhaari bhene hain ,toh agar tunhe koi maachod ya bhenchod bole to bura mat maanna " . My friend was asked by a senior two days back when he was caught salivating after a senior girl "kyu be saale apni senior ladkiyon ko aise kyu dekh ra hain" and he had replied"kyuki mai maachod hoon". In short contrary to DU where u make a fashion statement where u run after girls and where love is in the air, iit is all about desipana, haraamipana aur dosti.

FIRST DAY AT IITD

I had shifted to Aravali hostel just last evening and now as I wake up in the morning I felt butterflies in my stomach. "Maybe I should go to the toilet" I thought. I picked up the brush and paste and checked the time. My first class was at 10 and there was a lot of time. I thought about about going to sleep again but the i remembered the rules no breakfast after 9 fuck! I brushed and after a while brushed. Shashank and rahul, my roomies had already bathed, they had a class at 9. I bathed and checked the class number. MS 420 it said. It was a class on humanities since I don't like subjects like humanities, I thought 420 was a good room for a class like that.  I reached the ms(multi storeyed ) and found the room with relative ease. I sat down behind a few girls along with Pramit. I was trying my best to see their faces. No beautiful girls. Ok. Now that's what you expect out of iit don't you. you expect ainwee taedi ladkiyan in iit don't u? then trust me the iit people must be doing quite a hard work living up to your expectations. We sat there for about half an hour and after that some responsible people went to find the prof they returned and wrote down "all classes are cancelled for 2 weeks". Now this is weird. When you come to a class thinking "this is my first class in college, and I'll try my best not to sleep" and you realise there's no class u feel frustrated. We returned to the hostel. There was a class at 2 now. We had lunch in the hostel. Now of all the things you can dislike about iitd the mess food is going to be your biggest dislike. I don't know how they cook the food here but it's almost impossible to tell the difference between a chappati and chewing gum. After you have eaten here for more then a week, I can assure you, you'll never want a chewing gum again in your life. I attended the class at 2 .I tried to get a good seat which was for me usually the 2nd or the 3rd row. The prof entered the class. After just giving intro the fans stopped .The room was already hot and now no fans ."Hot weather, humid conditons and no lights, Welcome to IIT Delhi." the prof proudly said. Trust me at that moment the only thought that was crossing my mind was how much classes i'll be able to bunk. Few minutes later the lights returned and the rest of the class went smooth. This was my first day at iitd. More on this later.