RAGGING AT IITD

          Ragging rules are really strict at iitd.In the first week of our stay we were not allowed to be outside of our rooms after 9:30.Intros were being taken and the best part was that all of your intro had to be in Hindi .I mean who knows what jee is called in Hindi (for you people its called sanyukt pravesh pareeksha) and who knows what cricket is called in hindi(gol pind lamba dand dhad pakad pratiyogita).We were asked the basic vocabulary of iitd, like what does hukka maarna,whats maski maarna,meaning of frequency etc etc.people who had never abused in their lives were asked "koi fight to ni hain na gaaliyon se ." or "gaaliyan kyu ni deta.chal koi ni seekh jaega .mai bhi ni deta tha" .Fucchas were asked about their lives ,where they live ,whether they are full toss (full toss means who has cleared jee along with his 12th exam) or a tappa, they had a girlfriend or not .We were made to call our seniors 'sir' and everytime we met the seniors we were expected to wish them good morning or good evening. Laughing was strictly not allowed while you're with the seniors but you could see an obvious fear in the seniors for the ragging laws which in iitd are really strict. If u complain against a senior then within a week he's out of the hostel. It doesn't matter if you have logged a true complaint or a fake one the senior was in trouble. There was a team of some faculty members who visited the fresher wing at night and any senior caught was to be expelled out of the hostel. For some reasons I don't know I had become quite a well known fuchcha among the seniors. All the course teachers had told us the reference books for their courses. Because i play drums i had become acquainted with a few seniors who come to the music room. To borrow a book I was told to go to room no C4. It was still the first week of the college and for a fuchcha to go to the senior wing alone was a big thing. So I took amritesh along . When we reached the senior wing ,one senior who knew my name asked us "kyu be fuchcho ,bahut himmat hai ,kya karne aae ho."."sir ,wo book leni hai C43 se " I answered in a cool tone .he told me go to the mess at the ground floor with some empty bottles. When i returned he had the book in his hand ."tum dono chill ho na " now what did that meant. Obviously we were chill but at that moment i wanted to say no but we can't tell the senior we're not chill. We needed the book. We were ready to become chill for that. I said "haan". After that he led us to a room where two other seniors were there .he sat down on the bed and told us to close the door. Then another one asked "agar abhi warden aa gaya toh kya bologe .achha sa bahana batao." For a few seconds we stood their silence. Then another said "jindagi me kabhi bahana banaya hai ya nai ". Amritesh replied no. I was stunned .now ok u expect very seedha saadha students to come to iit but amritesh god !this place was full of surprises."haan bahut baar.bol denge ki book lene aae the ."I said."bhausdike ,darwaja band karke kaunsi book lete hain". He was right. He had made a point then I told them a few more excuses and one of them they liked. So now the ragging began. I was handed a bedsheet and told to wrap it like a saaree , then i was made to dance like a girl by shaking my ass. Then it was amritesh's turn to dance and I was told that to slap his ass as he shook it. After a few minutes we were given a empty Deo bottle and we were told to smooch it. I went first .the seniors cheered as i smooched .i was a good smoocher i learned that moment."saale tu toh kya smooch le raha hai "said one .then it was amritesh's turn. To be dishonest he wasn't a good smoocher .and to be honest he smooched like he was kissing a cow .I was told to smooch again to show him how its done. After the smooching ,they told me to say five lines on mango ."aam peela hota hai.aam garmiyon me aata hain.aam barishon ke baad chala jata hai......aam ko log choos choos ke khate hain ."I  went. Then one of them told me to repeat all those lines and in every line substitute aam for mera land. I repeated and all of them roared. Each time me and amritesh started laughing we were told not to laugh. Then it was amritesh's turn."tujhe game samajh aa gai na be ,to tu ab bol tarbooz pe ". Then came the best part of the whole ragging experience. The seniors told me that I could laugh.as amritesh said the line"tarbooz laal hota hai.yeh gol hota hai .isme kaale beej hote hai .yeh bel pe ugta hain .mujhe tarbooz khana bahut pasand hain."then one senior told him to substitute watermelon for mere tatte(in case u dont know tatte means scrotum or balls in english ). He repeated the lines. Now let me tell you with each line he said I laughed like hell and by the time he had reached the line"mujhe mere tatte khaana pasand hai" i was rolling on the floor laughing. My cheeks were hurting. My stomach pained and I just couldn't laugh any longer but the way he was saying it was damn funny. After that the seniors gave us the book and left us this wonderful story to tell. So this was how I was ragged the first time in my life. Ragging is about to start in iitd after the freshers night and I am looking forward to it .